


A Channel of your Peace

by HMS_Chill



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: Angst, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Canon, Redemption, i have Feelings about him, philip redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:42:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24099799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HMS_Chill/pseuds/HMS_Chill
Summary: Following Henry being outed, the election, and the end of the book, Henry and Philip slowly start to fix their relationship. There's blood that can't be unshed, but there's also a chance that things could get better.
Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Martha Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor/Philip Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor
Comments: 109
Kudos: 211





	1. Make me an Instrument of Your Peace

It starts with Bea, like so many things in Henry's life have. In this case, it's her dragging him and Alex to a musical because one of her friends saw it and said she just _had_ to see it in New York, so they join her to watch people from around the world come together to deal with tragedy. They watch a man from England and a woman from Texas fall in love in a tiny town in Canada, and they listen to instruments that have Bea rambling about soundscapes for the rest of the night. The next morning, Alex is humming a song from the show as he gets ready for a meeting. He hums it all day, until eventually, Henry comes up to kiss his cheek and ask him about it.

"Oh, it's... well it's an earworm, but it's got a prayer I grew up with. St. Somebody. Francis, maybe? Or Stephen? Francis I think; I'm not sure. And they changed some of the words so it would fit the hymn, but you know. It's the same thing, sort of."

"Do you remember the words?"

"Just the first bit."

"Tell me?"

"'Make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is offense, pardon; where there is doubt... faith? Where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy'. There's more, but that's all I remember. My Abuela has it hanging in her house; it's at the end of the guest bed and I used to read it in the morning when I didn't want to get up."

"It's beautiful. St. Francis, you said?"

"Yeah; I think so."

"Remember the V&A? That little chapel?"

"How could I forget?"

"That was from a church of St. Francis." Alex smiles, wrapping Henry in a hug and humming in his ear while Henry ties his tie so they can go out to dinner with Bea and Nora, the song now firmly lodged in both their heads.

\--  
_Make me an instrument of your peace_  
\--

Henry goes back to Kensington with Bea when she leaves, leaving Alex behind to finish a final before he'll join them for a dinner with ambassadors and a few other appearances. The first night back, the travel and time change put Henry to sleep almost immediately. But the next night, he's adjusted to the time, but he hasn't adjusted to an empty bed. He's not used to the fact that, without Alex, who runs unnaturally warm and could probably heat a sauna all on his own, no number of blankets will ever get him truly warm. So, eventually, he abandons his attempt at sleep and wanders down to one of Kensington's courtyards. Someone's there, and it takes him a second to recognize Philip. Alone on a bench, without any sort of guard up, he looks like a different person from the one Henry's used to seeing at public events or meetings.

"Pip?" he asks quietly. Philip turns with a start, relaxing a bit when he sees Henry, though he keeps some of his armor on.

"Hi, Henry." He sounds like he wants to stop after the first letter of Henry's name, but he's not sure he's earned that nickname yet. He's been sounding unsure about a lot of things ever since he and Henry established their tentative peace.

"Everything alright?"

Philip sighs, and when he chews his lip, Henry sees a mirror of his own nervous ticks. "Mazzy's not feeling well."

"I'm sorry."

"It's probably nothing. Just she's back at Anmer, and I wish I could be there." Henry's taken aback for a second. Philip doesn't seem like the kind of person to worry about something like this, at least not to the point of being up late. When they'd been sick as kids, Philip had always been the big brother pushing them to do things anyway, first because he was bored but quickly because it was what would make Gran happy, or it was what they needed to do. But he's worried now, and Henry isn't quite sure how to deal with that.

"Have... have you talked to her?"

"Of course." There's a snort of laughter with it, like Henry is an idiot for even suggesting he might not have. Henry hasn't realized he's moved closer and started to relax until then, but he automatically pulls back and straightens up. There's a moment of silence, then Philip seems to process his tone. "Sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't... I don't mean... I'm not upset with you; it was a good question. Mazzy and I... we talked earlier, but she went to bed early because she said she hoped that would help her feel better. I'm sorry."

"It's alright." Henry makes himself relax a bit, joining Philip on the bench. "I... I'm worried when I have to leave Alex alone and he might get sick, so I... I know it's hard. Have you touched base with her PPOs? They might be able to let you know how she's doing. Especially if you think she might not tell you; I have to do that with Alex's security sometimes because he won't actually tell me if something's wrong."

"That's... yeah, that's a good idea. Maybe they can convince her to relax a bit, too; she's been working really hard recently. I know if they let her, she'll just work through this and feel worse for it. Thank you. I... I mean it, really. I'm sorry for earlier."

"It's alright."

"How's... how's Alex? He's doing law, right?"

"Yeah, he's liking it. Overworking himself, probably, but that's... that's him."

Philip nods. "He sounds a bit like Mazzy. I... I know he doesn't like me, but maybe he'd like her."

Henry realizes suddenly that he's relatively comfortable. More than that, Philip doesn't seem nearly as stressed as he was when Henry came down. They've both settled into a sort of uneasy comfort when Henry yawns, then says, "I should... I'm going to call Alex to say goodnight, then try and get some sleep."

"That's smart. I'll call Mazzy's PPOs and see if they can tell me how she's doing. Thank you. And again, I'm... I'm sorry."

"Philip. It's okay. You... you were stressed; I understand. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight."

"Goodnight. If... if you think it's alright, tell Alex I say hello? And wish him good luck on his finals?" 

He looks so unsure, and Henry isn't sure if he'll end up saying anything to Alex, but he nods anyway. "Alright."

It's awkward. Every conversation with Philip feels awkward for at least a bit right now. But it's not nearly as awkward as it could have been, and Henry has the distinct feeling that he's helped Philip feel better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're off on a new adventure! The musical referenced is _Come From Away_ , which is incredible and wonderful and would absolutely hit different in New York than it would in the UK. I saw it in Iowa back in February and have been listening to "Prayer" a lot recently, and in looking for a way to write about Philip and Henry sort of trying to fix their relationship, the lyrics felt right, especially given Henry and Alex's connection to St. Francis.  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	2. Where there is Hatred, Let me Sow Love

When Henry gets to his room, he has three missed calls from Alex, all within a few minutes of each other. It's later than he'd realized; they were supposed to have called and talked about fifteen minutes ago. When he calls back, Alex opens with "I thought you might have fallen asleep; either that or the crown had you taken out for being gay. Everything okay over there?"

"I'm sorry I'm not available at your every beck and call, Alex."

"Yeah, well, you're late. We're supposed to be having steamy phone sex right now, and we're still catching up on our days."

"I was talking to Philip. He was worried, and helping him seemed a bit more important than hearing about how much you hate Ryan from your torts class."

"Okay, first off, Ryan from torts is the second worst. But Philip? Philip is like... the actual worst. What the hell."

Henry sighs. He'd expected something like this, but it doesn't make it easier to hear. "You don't have to like him, but the least you could do is be decent. He's my brother."

"Yeah, well, he sucks. And not in a good way. Just because he's your brother doesn't make him a good person, but I'll tell you what. I'll be decent like he was decent to you and Bea."

"Alex."

"I'll be decent like how he was decent to us. And your mom. Hell, I'll be as decent to him as he's been to me since we met, all fuckin side eyes and snide remarks."

"Alex, please. I don't want to fight with you right now. He... he's trying, at least, so if you could try too, that would be nice. It was actually a nice conversation today; I think we might have more in common than we knew. He's worried about Martha overworking herself and getting sick. Sounds a bit like someone I know."

"I don't know what you're talking about; I'm a pinnacle of health and a poster child for a work/life balance. I've only had four cups of coffee today, and I spent a whole ten minutes playing with David before I went back to my essays."

"Dear god, Alex, I--"

"I'm joking. I've had three square meals and eight cups of water, and David and I took an hour long walk where I talked to my family." His tone softens a bit on, "but seriously, H, you don't need to worry. I'm okay here, and I'll be there soon enough. Two more finals and I'm yours."

"You finished your essay, then?"

"Got it in before dinner." Henry can hear the smile in his voice, and when he tells him he's proud, Alex's voice gets even lighter. They catch up, filling each other in on their days and talking about what they'll do when Alex is free of finals and able to join Henry for the weekend. They've got a state dinner to go to on Friday, and they're moderating a panel of queer activists and voices on Sunday, but they have all of Saturday to spend together in London. Henry wants to take Alex up in the Eye, since he's never been. Alex wants to see the V&A again ("and actually see things this time, not just make out. I mean, we'll make out a lot, but I do want to see the things you love"), and they'll do something, probably brunch, with Bea and Pez as well.

Eventually, their conversation circles back to what Henry's been doing, and Alex says, "I'm sorry for being an asshole earlier. I know you're trying with Philip; it's not my place or job to try and tell you how to deal with your family. I'll follow your lead, so if you say he's trying and you're trying, I... I'm going to try, too, when I'm there."

"Thank you. He... he asked about you tonight. Asked how you were doing, and he said I should tell you hello from him and wish you good luck on your tests if it felt right."

"Oh."

"He thought you and Martha might get along, so maybe you could try and talk to her at the dinner? You two might have more in common as official suitors than you realize, and he thinks you might get along since you both pour so much into things you're passionate about. I know it's not much to go on, but he... Philip doesn't know you. At least he's trying." Alex hasn't done much to give Philip an opportunity to get to know him, but Henry doesn't say that. 

"He hasn't made much of an attempt to know me, but I'll see about talking to Martha."

"Philip's tried to get to know you a bit through me. I think he's sort of afraid to talk to you because he's not sure how it will go. He doesn't have any positive history with you, and you were a bit more open about disliking him than some of us were. We'll see when you get here, but I think he wants to know you. Really, I think... I think he wants our family back, he's just worried to upset us and make it worse. Especially with you."

Alex is quiet for a moment, but Henry knows him well enough to know he's processing that. "What have you told him? All the good things?"

"Well, not _all_ the good things. I think he might actually dislike you if he knew those. But I've told him about how passionate you are, and how important your family is to you, and how hard you try. Things he might not realize from your social media or your sort of First Son Image, but not... not everything. Mostly just that you're deeper and you work harder than it looks to the public."

"So he does sort of know about me, at least. That's... Will you tell me about him some? Just... what he was like growing up, and why you want to try so much? I only know how he's hurt you, and that's... that's not fair."

So Henry talks. He talks about family picnics growing up, when he'd find worms and Philip would put them on fishing hooks for him because he could never get it right himself. He talks about ballroom dance lessons, when Philip taught him how to stand and put his arms in the right places, since the teacher was busy with someone else and they both hated the suits they had to wear. He talks about how they used to share a room, and he'd wake up at night and Philip would be there, and even just having a big brother close was enough to help him feel more comfortable. Then he talks about the bad years, too, when their dad was gone and they all had to grow up. He talks about how their Gran took Philip into her office the day after their dad died and when he came out, his back was ramrod straight and he'd apparently resolved not to cry any more. He talks about how Philip went back to his air force deployment the day after the funeral, and how things fell apart at home but at least he was home, not off with happy strangers and a culture that demanded he 'man up'. He tells Alex how even when Philip came home from the RAF deployment, he was different somehow, and how he'd decided that it was his job to keep them all out of the tabloids and the media and the public eye, since they didn't have a parent who could do that anymore. He talks for so long, he'd be sure that anyone but Alex stopped listening. He wraps it up with "I don't think he meant badly, really. I mean, he hurt us, but he... He was just as hurt, I think, and just trying to figure out how to be a person in the same way we were. Bea and I had each other to help, but he... He was sort of on his own with Gran. So I... I know he hurt us, and I know he hurt you, and I know this doesn't fix it. But I don't really think he wanted to. I think he was hurting, too. 

"So will you... when you come, will you give him a chance and be civil, at least? I don't want to have to mediate fights between the two of you; I just... I want you both to be able to be comfortable in the same room, at least. So will you try to be nice?"

"I will. I didn't... I think it'll help now that I understand why. I can't believe we've never talked about any of that before."

"Yes, well. My... my family can be a lot, and memories can be hard for us, but for me especially."

"I know. I'm sorry; I didn't mean to blame you or-- what?" 

Henry's started to laugh a bit. "Nothing. It's just, well, when I talked to him, he'd apologize for everything he did that upset me even a bit. Maybe you two aren't as polar opposite as you think."

Alex laughs, too. They finish their call, and he promises again to try his best with Philip. That's all Henry can ask for, and given that it's Alex's best, it's sure to be great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hey hey! This was a bit of a different chapter, and I know our boy Alex doesn't look the best, but I wanted to give people a bit of a peek into why I think it's important to Henry to fix his relationship with Philip. Plus, I feel like by the end of the book (c. page 391) Alex is a lot more upset with Philip than Henry was, so his anger felt like a good way to let Henry express things.  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	3. Where There is Offense, Let Me Bring Pardon

Alex arrives just before the state dinner, giving them only the time from Heathrow to Buckingham to really be alone. They make the most of it, a mix of making sure the other is _actually_ alright and using their mouths for more exciting things. When they get close to Buckingham, Henry pulls back to fix Alex's hair before they have to step out of the car and into Henry's world. He's not thrilled to belong here, but Alex is by his side, both of them smiling as they walk into the palace and the dinner. It helps to know that Alex doesn't mind these events, especially when they're open to heads of global states. He may still roll his eyes a bit at someone called Basil or Dorian or Bartholomew, but he'll find an interesting conversation somewhere. There's a good chance he'll spend that night telling Henry what he's learned about the differences between American and French immigration law or what steps queer activists are taking in Italy. He thrives here in a way Henry never has, and Henry's just glad to know he'll be happy enough, and that he's not dragging Alex to somewhere he'll be miserable.

They sit beside each other for dinner, even if they're in different conversations, but they drift a bit as they're sharing drinks and finger foods with guests afterward. Henry sees Alex talking to someone he thinks might be a diplomat from South Africa, and Alex looks happy and engaged. He's stuck as a third wheel in a conversation between politicians from Scotland and Finland, smiling and nodding without actually contributing anything, when he feels a hand on his shoulder and turns to see Martha. She looks a bit pale, but she's smiling.

"Henry, darling, could I borrow you a moment?"

"Of course. If you two gentlemen will excuse me." He's not even sure they notice as he takes a few steps away, smiling at Martha as she leads him to an emptier corner of the room. "Thank you so much. How are you feeling? How was the trip from Anmer?"

"I'm alright, and the trip went well. And this doesn't have to take too long, if you'd like to go find Alex or talk to someone else, but I just wanted to ask you something, and I'm not sure I'll have a chance before I go back tomorrow. It's... it's something Pip is too nervous to ask you or Bea, but he--" she stops, a hand on her stomach. She's at least a shade paler than she was a moment before.

"Are you alright?" Henry reaches out to take her arm, and she grabs his with an iron claw. There's a slight sheen of sweat peeking through her setting powder, and she takes what looks like a forced a deep breath before answering.

"I'm... I'm going to be sick." Her eyes dart toward the door at the front of the room, but Henry knows that's not the place to go. It opens into a wide hall and a series of entertaining rooms, and there is a toilet, but it's not a good toilet to be sick in. Bea had gone there with the flu once when they were growing up, and he remembers everyone at dinner trying to ignore it as the sounds of her being sick echoed around the empty rooms.

"Follow me." She looks worried as he guides her toward the back of the room, but he promises it'll be alright as he pushes open a small door and leads the way through a short maze of servant's quarters to the nearest private toilet. Between the insulation in the walls and the sheer number of turns they took to get here, any noise should be muffled. 

Her grip on his arm has tightened, but she has her other hand over her mouth. Her eyes are wide over it, and she barely makes it to the toilet before a sludge of dinner comes back up. Henry kneels beside her, gathering her hair in one hand and texting Alex with his other. Philip won't check his phone, not at an event like this, but Alex will. Henry just hopes Alex will be on good enough terms with Philip to be able to get him here.

When the text is sent, Henry pulls Martha's hair into a loose braid and rubs her back gently until she's done being sick, then gets her a cup of water when she sits up. She looks like she's planning to go back to the dinner like nothing's happened, but she looks tired and she's still a bit pale, so Henry sits on the floor with his back against the wall and says, "let's just wait here for a bit, okay? Philip's... I texted Alex to get Philip, so he should be here soon."

She nods, sitting on the floor next to him and leaning back with a yawn. "I'm sorry. I've... I've just been so tired recently."

"Philip said you've been working a lot."

"Yes, well, that's sort of what I wanted to speak to you about. Pip and I, well. We... we've been thinking of opening a charity as well. It would be focused on helping military families, especially ones separated by overseas deployment. He... being gone while your father was ill was hard for him, even if he won't necessarily talk about it a lot. He wants to help keep families closer together, and try to find ways to keep them connected more even when deployment takes people away from the people they love, but he's afraid that you and Bea will be upset or think he's stealing your ideas. I've tried to tell him that I don't think you'll be upset, but he... I think he's just afraid to upset you both again."

"I don't think either of us could be upset about that; it's a great idea. I think Bea would, too, especially since we both saw how much being away while Dad was sick hurt him."

\--

In the after-dinner mingling, Alex has just noticed Henry's missing when he feels his phone buzz. He manages to sneak a look, and when it's Henry, he slips to the edge of the room to actually read it.

He can barely believe he's doing this, but a minute later, he's fining Philip to ask, "your highness, could I have a minute?" Philip looks confused as he turns, but Alex says, "Martha's sick; Henry had to take her to a bathroom."

Philip is moving even before Alex is done telling him what's happening, turning to ask, "did he say where they are?"

So Alex has no choice but to follow him, shooting off a text to Henry asking where they are as he follows Philip out into a wide entrance room.

\--

"I know the RAF is important to him, and he does really love it. He just... it was hard for him to be there instead of being able to grieve with all of you. So if he could put together something to fund flights home for members of the RAF who need to go home but can't afford it, or to fly families to visit people who are deployed, that--" she stops, a hand going to her mouth for a moment before the nausea seems to pass.

"If you were ill, you didn't have to come tonight. We would have understood," Henry says gently. Martha sighs, looking suddenly exhausted.

"I honestly felt fine. It's... I don't feel ill, not really. I'm tired, but then this nausea, it... it just comes out of nowhere. You saw; one moment I'm fine and the next, it's bad enough that I'll be sick."

"Have you considered seeing a doctor?"

\--

Philip goes straight to a bathroom, but it's empty. Alex texts Henry again, asking where they are as Philip leads the way through a series of incredibly fancy, disappointingly empty bathrooms. He's starting to get more and more worried as they go, his shoulders tensing and his mouth tightening in an expression Alex recognizes from Henry's most stressed moments. By their fourth empty bathroom, Alex grabs him by the shoulders.

"Hey. Calm down; it's going to be alright. Take a deep breath. Yeah, that's good; take another. We'll find them. I promise." Philip takes another deep breath, finally meeting Alex's eyes. For a moment, he doesn't feel like the Philip who's hurt Henry and Bea so much over the past five years. He's just a scared person, and Alex knows all too well what it feels like to be so worried about someone he loves. After a bit, Alex says, "they wouldn't have come this far if Martha was going to throw up. Is there another way out of that room, or a closer bathroom? We both know Henry; we can figure out where he took her."

\--

"I've considered it, but it's only been happening for a week or two. I... I'm just not sure it's anything, and I don't want to make too much of an issue about it."

"If you're not feeling well, though, it would be worth it to see a doctor. We all want you to be healthy."

"I suppose. Really, it... I think it might just be that time of the month. I'm not sure; it shouldn't be, but maybe that's it. The nausea and tiredness are things that aren't uncommon, even if I don't usually get them."

"Have you... I'm sorry if this is forward, but have you considered the idea that you might be pregnant?"

\--

Philip takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for a second. When he opens them again, he looks horrified. "There's... there's a back door. Oh my god, of course he took her out the back door. There's a more private bathroom there and everything. That's where they are, but I... I can't get through that bloody room without having to talk to people. I'll be there all night before I can get to her."

"I'll get you through. I... I can cause a distraction. Is there a $75,000 cake in there?"

\--

"I hadn't considered it, but I... I suppose maybe..." Martha looks worried, and Henry can all but hear her mind working. "Can I... How would I even go about getting a test; if I buy one anywhere someone will say something, and it'll be everywhere."

"One second. Bea and I... we made them put tests in every bathroom here as a sort of... I don't know, a sort of prank on Gran, I guess. It was sort of daft; I was drunk and she was ranting, and Nora thought it was funny. One second..." he rummages around in a cabinet for a minute, pulling out a few pads and tampons before he finds the pregnancy tests and holds one out for Martha. "You... you don't have to, but if you want, I could step out."

Martha's hand is shaking a bit as she nods, taking the test. Henry steps out, closing the door behind him, and he looks down the hall just in time to see Philip turn the corner, looking incredibly relieved. A moment later, Alex appears, drenched to the bone in something that smells suspiciously like champagne. Philip is ready to rush into the bathroom, but Henry convinces him to wait until they hear a flush, and when Martha opens the door a bit Philip is there to fret over her. Alex can't help but notice the similarities to Henry as Philip cups Martha's face and gets them both inside the door.

Henry smiles a bit, then turns to Alex and immediately has to hold him back to keep from getting drenched in whatever Alex is drenched in.

"Do I want to know why it took you so long, or why you're covered in champagne?"

"Well, we went the wrong way, and then Philip needed to get through the dinner without anyone stopping him, so I... caused a distraction."

"What kind of distraction?"

"Well, since there wasn't a $75,000 cake to fall into, I settled for a champagne fountain. What? Don't give me that look; it was to help your brother! I've fallen into two different expensive things for y'all; be grateful." Henry rolls his eyes, but he is grateful. At least tomorrow's tabloids will be more interested in Alex's distraction than the fact that Henry and Martha had left the party early.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like a little disaster to bring people together, am I right?  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	4. Where There is Doubt, Let Me Bring Faith

Getting a champagne-soaked Alex back to Kensington is an adventure, to say the least, involving a variety of attempted solutions to protect a car interior from his disaster before they eventually decide to just walk. The champagne dries on the way, leaving Alex coated in a sweet, sticky mess. Mr. Wobbles loves it, and Henry has to hold him back while Alex escapes to the shower, leaving Henry to bring his pajamas and join him in the shower to help get champagne out of his hair. He's jet lagged and asleep almost as soon as they're in bed, leaving Henry to hold him close, smiling at the scent of the tea tree oil shampoo Alex uses only when they travel. He used to smell like this all the time, but he'd read that tea tree oil was bad for dogs once and had immediately switched shampoos for while they were at home. Now, he smells like tea tree while they're away from David, and Henry loves the scent even more than he used to.

He's been asleep for a bit when Henry's phone goes off, and he knows he shouldn't, but that's Shaan's text tone. Henry knows he should be asleep, or at least staying off his phone so he can sleep eventually, but, well, it's Shaan. It could be important. He rolls to check it, careful not to wake Alex.

"I don't want to worry you, but Philip has been standing in front of your door for the past fifteen minutes. I think he wants to talk to you but doesn't want to knock."

Henry sighs, thanks Shaan, and presses a kiss to Alex's forehead before carefully extracting himself from Alex's arms. Alex rolls around in bed a bit before finding a pillow to cuddle in Henry's absence. Henry pulls the blanket up over his bare shoulder a bit, making sure Alex is comfortable before he opens his bedroom door and slips out. Philip is there, wearing pajamas and looking surprisingly disheveled and more vulnerable than Henry is used to seeing him.

"Henry! You... hello."

"Hello. Shaan said you've been out here for a bit; is everything alright? Martha feeling better?"

"She's alright, or well, she will be. I'm... everything is alright, really, just... we found out Mazzy's pregnant. I know you sort of thought she would be, but you were right."

"Oh, congratulations."

"Thank you. I'm... I'm not sure they're warranted, for me especially, but thank you. I wanted to tell you first, since you sort of already knew a little, and, well, I thought maybe... maybe I could ask you some things, if that's alright. Since you've got, you know, your youth shelters, and I know you're close to the children there. I know it's not really the same thing as being a father, but I thought at least you might know some of what I should do, or at least what I shouldn't do. It's probably daft, but I... I just don't think I know what to do, really; I... Dad and I weren't particularly close, and when I tried to look after you and Bea I did a rotten job of it, so I think I need to ask someone for advice, and I... you were the first one I thought of."

"Philip, it's... are you scared?" Henry asks, finally registering the chewed lip and the way Philip's rambling and pacing. At the question, he stills, straightening up and looking almost indignant. Henry shakes his head quickly. "It's okay to be scared; I think... if I'm honest, I think being scared is totally normal, and I think it might be a better sign than you want it to be. It means you're... you know, you're aware of how hard it is to be a parent, and you're aware that you can't just do it on instinct. You're taking this seriously, and I think it'll make you be careful and think about things, and that will make you a better father."

"I'm terrified," Philip admits, his shoulders slumping. "I don't know how to be a dad. I'm realizing you probably don't really know, either, so it might have been stupid to come to talk to you, but I'm... I'm not really sure who else to ask. I'm sorry; you're trying to sleep and Alex is here; I shouldn't--"

"It's okay. I... I don't really know how to be a dad, but I can do my best to talk to you about it and help you if I can."

"I... I'd like that. I... I'd ask someone else, someone who'd know better or would maybe have more experience being a father. I... I'd ask Dad, if I could, but as it is, I'm just not quite sure who else to talk to."

"I'll help you, and I don't mind at all, but we... you don't have to do this alone. I know it must have been lonely just you and Gran all those years, especially after Dad died and we all sort of abandoned each other. It... it wasn't easy for any of us, but we... we have each other now. You've got me and Bea and Mum, and Martha and her family, too."

Philip looks surprised, but he nods. "It... it was lonely. I don't think I knew it at the time, but looking back, I was really lonely and sort of just scared. I... I don't think I knew if I was allowed to be sad, or how or where I should go or anything. So to... to know you all want to help, it's nice. Thank you."

"Of course. We... I can tell you what I know, or at least what I've learned parents shouldn't to do from children at work. Should we make some tea now, or would you rather wait until morning?"

"It can wait, I suppose. Alex is here, and you're probably trying to sleep." It doesn't sound like he wants to wait. Henry has to admit he's not sure it can wait, either; he and Philip have a sort of strange friendship that won't be the same once the sun comes up.

"If you want to, I... I'm open to talking tonight. Alex will be here tomorrow, too, and I'm already awake. We could go down to the kitchen for some tea and see if there are biscuits?"

Philip nods, and as they go to the kitchen together, he says, "Thank you, Henry. Really, I appreciate all of this."

"Of course. That's... that's what family is for," Henry says. He risks a look at Philip's face, and he catches a moment of surprise before his face settles into a smile. Philip reaches up and ruffles Henry's hair, almost hesitantly; it's something their dad used to do. Henry smiles at him, and Philip smiles back, and it looks more real than any of his other smiles have all night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the prayer is about doubting god, but Philip doubting his own ability to parent both felt better for this and helped make him vulnerable in a way that I wanted to explore, especially in terms of his relationship with Henry. I've already disappointed Catholicism using a prayer for a gay fanfic, so this is the least of my sins.  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	5. Where there is Despair, Let Me Bring Hope

They're halfway through their tea and biscuits when Philip says, "what do you think Bea will say?"

"About the charity, or the baby?" They've been talking about both, and Henry's had to reassure Philip that the charity is a good idea at least three times. He's still worried, and probably will be until it actually gets launched and he gets to help people, but he seems to be a bit less worried about it by now.

"Both, I suppose. She... I think she's more angry with me than you were. She's probably the angriest of anyone, except maybe Alex, but he was mostly mad for you, and I... I don't think he hates me after tonight. But Bea... she's mad for you, but also for herself. I was awful to her."

"I mean, none of us were particularly wonderful to each other."

"Yes, well. You two were. You looked after each other, and I just made it worse. I know the two of us have sort of maybe made up a bit now, but I'm not so sure about her. She gave me quite the talking-to when she dragged me out of that meeting with Gran, about how awful I'd been to you and how much work I had to do if I ever wanted to be close to either of you again. She was right, of course, because she's always right about things, and I think I've done better, but I worry she's still upset with me. I just want things to be, you know, at least alright? I don't need her to be my best friend or anything, but I'd like her to not be mad at me. And I know I have to do better, but I... I'd like her to like me again."

"You have done better. You're working on it, and I... that's all I could ask, at least. And if I'm honest, I think she wants things to be alright, too. It's a bit harder for her, because I think she's worrying about me and if I'm happy and comfortable, too. I haven't really talked to her about it so I can't say for sure, but I think she wants to make sure I don't feel like I'm loosing her. So she's dealing with her emotions and her interpretation of my emotions, and that's just sort of a lot to work through, you know?"

"I... I think so. She's such a good older sibling," Philip says. He sighs, his head sinking into a hand as he rubs his forehead. Henry just nods.

"She is. And I think if anyone we know can teach you how to look after someone who's having a hard time, either as a parent of as someone who's helping them get help, it would be her. I could do my best, and I'm sure Martha and Mum have their own ways of helping, but Bea... Bea just knows what to do. I don't know if it's something she learned at NA or something, but she... every time I'm upset, she's known how to fix it. So I can do my best to help you know how to be a good dad, but I think she would be better."

"But she... I don't know what she thinks of me," Philip tells his cup of tea. "What if I try to talk to her, and she just tells me I'll be a shit dad? Or that she thinks I'm just stealing her idea for a charity, and she won't help, and then it all spirals out of control? And I know-- I know she probably won't say any of that, but what if she thinks it? What if... I just want her to like me. Or, at the very least, just... just not hate me."

"I don't think she hates you. Not anymore, at least."

Philip looks up at that, actually looking surprised. "You don't?"

"No. I don't think she's hated you for a while."

"Really?"

"Really. I think... I think she wants to be friends again; she's just not sure she can trust you. And that's... you know, you'll just have to show her that she can. But you can't show her she can trust you if you won't talk to her."

"I'm just afraid I'll mess it up. I... I don't know how to fix things, not with everything that's happened. I... you didn't hear this, at least I don't think you did, but when she went to rehab the first time, I... I was awful to her. I remember screaming about how she'd made me come back, because all I wanted was to be away from all of it. It hurt so much to see you and her and Mum and Gran all falling apart, and when I was deployed, I could just... I shut it out. I shut it all out, just pretended it wasn't happening and tried to move on. I pretended everything was normal, but when I had to come home to look after her I had to face it all. And she took the brunt of all of that. All my grief, and my anger, it all just exploded that day. It's... I don't remember what I said, but she and I had this screaming match while you and Pez were out doing something, just going at each other with all the hurt we'd both been trying to ignore. I wanted... I wanted her to hurt as much as I was, and I couldn't understand that she was hurting the same way. That night, when she checked herself out and the two of you came back here together, she... she found me the next morning and told me that I was part of why she'd left rehab, and that if I ever wanted to help anyone, I'd never treat them like I'd treated her ever again. And then she went, but it... she said it was because you loved her, not because I yelled at her. She's the one who made me at least acknowledge that Dad was gone. It... I remember not knowing how to grieve for him. Because you two were close to him, but I... I wanted so much to be the good son, and the good heir, and I knew I had this role that he didn't... I don't know if he understood. So I spent a long time feeling like I wasn't good enough for him, and wanting something he couldn't give me, so when I was trying to grieve him it felt like I wasn't... like I didn't deserve to. Like you two deserved to be sad, but I didn't, because I still had to be the good heir and the man of the family, so I couldn't be sad. I don't know if any of this makes sense, please tell me you haven't been listening." His face is red, and he's studying the wood grain of the table like his life depends on being able to perfectly re-create it. His hands are in front of him, though, so Henry carefully reaches over to grab one. Philip starts, then looks up.

"Have... have you ever considered seeing a therapist? I know they made us all go to a session or two with the grief counselor after Dad died, but I mean a more permanent therapist."

"I didn't think I needed to."

"It might help. You don't have to, obviously, I'm not going to make you, but it... they might be able to help you process things and not be so worried all the time. Our lives have always been so public, and all our problems feel so exlposive, but losing Dad especially was... it was hard. Things aren't supposed to happen like that; it wasn't something we were ready for, any of us. And even now, there's a lot on all our plates, but yours especially, I think, especially with the baby. Sometimes, at least for me, it's nice to have someone to share the load a bit. And as much as Martha or I might want to help, and we do, I think maybe if you can find a good therapist, they might be better. They'd be able to help more like Bea can help people. If... if you want, I can help you find one."

"Do you really think it would help? I don't... I..." Henry can see the wheels turning in his head. "I always sort of thought I wasn't the kind of person to need therapy. I had to be the one who didn't, because if I was put together and everything I thought I had to be, then you and Bea could go to therapy and fall apart and it wouldn't matter as much. So I've been just shoving things down and ignoring them ever since Dad died, but maybe... do you think someone could deal with all that? I don't... I was awful to the two of you. I don't want to be awful to a baby, too. Martha doesn't deserve that, and neither does he."

"I think, if we find the right person, they can help you deal with it. They might not be able to take care of all of it in nine months, but you could at least get started."

Philip considers, then nods. "I... can you help me? I don't know anything about therapy. I know the RAF has therapists, but they're for people with PTSD and combat-related things, and that's not really me. How do I even find someone?"

"I can text my therapist and see what he thinks, or if he knows anyone, but--"

"You text your therapist?"

"Yeah. I think it's a work number, but sometimes he texts me pictures of dogs or other things he thinks I'll like. And he might be up now, since he's in New York. I found him through the shelter, since he works there and I wanted to help kids realize going to talk to him isn't a bad thing, but he's actually really cool."

"I didn't... I thought for therapy you just go lie on a couch and don't look at the person."

"I... mine isn't like that, at least. There might still be people who do it that way, but mine is a bit more fun. Sometimes he shoots me with nerf guns, or like I said, he sends me pictures of dogs. Once he brought it a cupcake and made me eat it because his daughter made it and he wanted to tell her a prince ate her food."

Philip looks surprised, but he agrees to let Henry ask his therapist about things that Philip could look for. Then, they sit hunched over Henry's phone as the dregs of their tea go cold. Henry's therapist texts them back to say he's proud of Philip and with a list of things he could look for, and when Philip eventually is yawning enough that Henry feels guilty for keeping him up, they've got a list of therapists for their security teams to vet and for Philip to try. When Henry gently pulls the pillow out of Alex's arms and slips himself in its place, he's exhausted, but he's also more excited for Philip than he has been in a long, long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to revisions for doubling the length of this (still pretty short) chapter, and to my local city council for considering our demands so I didn't have to protest tonight and could get this out! I'm taking commissioned fic over on tumblr with proof of donation to a BLM organization or a community aid/bail fund if y'all want me to write anything.  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	6. Where There is Darkness, Let Me Bring Light

It happens slowly, starting over the course of the week while they're both in Kensington. Henry finds himself smiling at Philip during a meeting, a genuinely happy smile rather than the half-smiles he's gotten used to falling back on. The next day, during a break from meetings, they eat lunch together at a place Philp likes, with outdoor seating because they've been in stuffy rooms all day, and it's nice. They've finally stopped tip toeing around each other and are starting to just be friends, and Henry is so, so glad. Bea joins them for a movie one night, settling across the couch from Philip with Henry in the middle, and they argue over popcorn flavors instead of anything serious, and it feels good. 

When Henry goes home to Brooklyn, he promises to call. Philip says he'd like that, and he seems sincere. So Henry does call, and Philip gets added into his weekly phone call rotation, and it feels right. When Philip gets a therapist approved, he calls Henry to talk about his first appointment, and it's five AM in New York, but Philip needs someone and Henry is so glad they're starting to fix things that he can't find it in himself to be upset he's up early. He just helps convince Philip that the therapist is a good fit, and he gets to ask about Martha and the baby, about how they're painting a room with a little forest and working on finding the perfect first bear. Bea's sent them a few already, and Henry knows he has a few to bring when he visits next (he and Alex are arguing about whether the beagle or the longhorn will be more popular), but Philip and Martha want to get the baby one from Mom and Dad, and Martha in particular wants it to be perfect. Then Philip talks about the charity he's still working on starting, and Henry gets to listen to him talk about how amazing Martha is, which is something he didn't realize he loved so much. He'd never really gotten to know her before he and Philip started to get along, but the way Philip tells it, she's some sort of nearly perfect superwoman who can single-handedly design a nursery, set up a charity, and be a member of the royal family, all while hiding some particularly nasty morning sickness from the nosy British press. Henry knows he's working hard, too, but the way Philip tells it, he's doing next to nothing while Martha saves the world. He clearly adores her, and when he talks about her, he gets more excited than Henry's seen him about anything else. He changes from a perfect heir to a lovesick teenager, all excited praise and rambling stories. Henry just grins and laughs through it all, settling at the computer and placing a few very special Etsy orders. A week later, _People_ 's front cover is dominated by a picture of Philip on a run, sporting a t-shirt with a collage of Martha's face and the words "Martha's Biggest Fan". #MarthasBiggestFan trends on UK twitter for hours, only bolstered when Philip tweets a picture of a mug covered in her face with a thanks to Henry. Alex sees it, and he laughs, and it's nice. A few days later, a package arrives with a shirt covered in Alex's face and the words "Alex's Biggest Fan".

When Martha's first ultrasound picture comes in a group chat to him and Bea, Henry's not sure if it's intentional, but he likes it. The baby is healthy, and Philip is starting to be more excited than nervous, and it feels right to have a group chat with his siblings, even if it's an accidental one.

He texts their group chat when numbers at the Brooklyn shelter look good for the next year, and his siblings get to celebrate with him. When Bea and Philip get tea together somewhere, Bea sends a picture of them with an empty chair and a packet of Jaffa cakes to tell him they miss him. When Bea and Henry meet up at a youth shelter in Argentina for a D&D fundraiser, Philip texts them saying he's got to go to bed before the stream starts, but he hopes they win and will watch tomorrow. 

Slowly, the three of them start to be actual friends again. The next time Henry goes to London, right before the appointment where Martha could find out the baby’s sex, Philip invites him and Bea to lunch. They go, the three of them together, and it’s nice. They catch up, and eventually, Philip puts his fork down and says, "I... while you're both here, I sort of wanted to ask something, if that's okay? Mazzy and I, we don't know the baby's gender-- sex, or well, either, I guess, yet, but we were thinking... if it's-- they're a boy, we're thinking of maybe naming him for Dad? As a middle name. We're still not sure on the first, but I... I wanted to ask you both if that's alright, I suppose. Mum said it was alright with her, but you were both closer to him than I was, and I don't want to... to steal the name or anything if one of you wanted to use it. It's just... Mazzy and I thought it might be nice."

"It's alright with me," Henry says. "I don't think Alex and I are particularly concerned with children, but if we did want some I think we'd adopt, especially if you've got some to follow the line of succession. Not that it matters to us, but just for everyone else."

"I think it's a good idea," Bea agrees. "You're the only one of us who's particularly likely to have children you can name; I think it's right to name one for Dad. What other names are you thinking?"

Philip grins, the nervous energy he's been radiating all meal fading away. "Thank you. I'm glad you don't mind, and that I get to do something to sort of... celebrate him, I guess. First names we're thinking Victoria or Elizabeth for a girl, but we're not quite sure for a boy. We thought Owen, maybe, or Oliver. We considered Peter, but didn't like how that went with Arthur as a middle name. But then, well, we... we actually thought, maybe, if it's okay with Henry, we'd name him Edward."

Henry freezes with a bite halfway to his mouth. "Edward? That's... that's one of my names."

"I know. And we don't have to use it, but we... Martha and I, we both liked the sound of it, and... and we wanted him to be like you. When he grows up, I mean. You don't have to say yes, we can go with something else."

"No, I.. I'd be honored. Really. I was surprised, but it... that's really kind of you both. Thank you."

"Edward Arthur? Or are you thinking of more middle names?" Bea asks. Philip shakes his head. 

"No; we didn't want to do the seven-names-thing to it. Them. Shit. I just remembered trying to write our full names in grammar school and didn't want to put a child through that. Edward Arthur Fox Mountchristen-Windsor felt like enough."

"And if they're a girl? You mentioned Elizabeth or Victoria, any specific middle names you're thinking of? Cat, for Mom?" Bea asks, and Philip smiles, and they go back to a lunch where Philip is relaxed and happy, talking about baby names and charity names and whatever else comes up. 

As they head back to Kensington, Henry's struck by how impossible this all would have been a few months ago. Somehow, though, he and Philip and Bea have all changed. It makes sense now that, when the sun disappears and it starts to rain, he and Bea are grabbing Philip's hands to pull him into a run toward Kensington. It makes sense that, instead of calling a car or lecturing them about how running will actually get them wetter than if they just walked, he laughs a bit and runs with them. It makes sense to get dried off and pile into a movie room, where they say they'll all do work but really just end up turning on a TV, settling on the couch in front of it with blankets while Henry calls the kitchen for three bowls of differently-flavored popcorn and Bea channel surfs. 

Henry's getting their popcorn sorted out when Bea and Philip both go quiet, and when he looks over, Bea's found a Bond movie. Henry passes out popcorn and finds a spot on the couch between them, and together, they watch their dad fight bad guys, the rain against the windows behind them a quiet backdrop. They've caught it near the end, which means they're just in time to see their dad save the day. As the credits roll, Henry asks, "can... can y'all tell me about Dad? And what it was like to know him when you weren't just a kid? You don't have to now, but... sometime? Because I... I sort of only knew him when I was a kid, and I feel like it's different when you're older, and I just wonder what that would have been like sometimes."

Bea pulls him into a hug, nodding, and Philip says, "I wasn't the closest to him, but of course."

A moment later, Bea looks at him more closely and asks, "did you just say 'y'all'? What are they doing to you over in the colonies?"

"There's no gender neutral, plural English 'you'!" Henry protests. "Y'all is the only one we have!"

Bea laughs. Philip opens his mouth, then closes it again, and Henry can see the wheels turning in his head.

"So... so 'y'all' is better than 'you guys', because 'guys' is for men? Is that right? Could I say 'you all' and be alright? Or... what should I say?"

"I think 'you all' would be alright, it's just a bit clunky. Just say 'y'all'. Give Gran a heart attack," Henry says. "Both of you adopt it, and we'll horrify her into retirement."

Bea laughs again, and Philip smiles, then says, "I... is it okay if I ask you things like that? I want to understand, but it's... a lot of things are confusing, and there's so much to learn. I thought I would be okay when I learned about the LGBTD, but now there's more, and there are some things I thought I wasn't supposed to say but some people say that's okay, and I... I don't know what to think, or where to find things, and a lot if it is complicated."

"Of course you can ask me. I'm not... I'm not an expert, really, but I've learned a lot from the kids at the shelter, and I'll do my best. But can I ask, um... D?"

"For drag? Is that not one of them? It's okay; you can laugh at me." So Henry does laugh a little, and Philip laughs, too, and Henry explains a bit of what drag is and how it interacts with queerness. Then, he googles the full acronym, noting that it's not all the identities but it is a start, and he watches Philip's eyes go wide.

"There's so many. I just learned 'bisexual' and 'transgender' a few months ago; I thought that was it."

"What... But you've known 'LGBT' longer than a few months. What did you think the B and T stood for?"

"Bottom and top? Lesbian, gay, bottom, top."

“Long ago, the four sexualities lived together in harmony, but everything changed when the bottom army attacked,” Bea says, switching the TV to music, “only the verse, master of all sexualities, could stop them. But when the world needed them most, they vanished.”

Henry laughs, and so does Philip. For a minute, they’re kids again, the three of them on a couch against the world. Philip asks what a verse is, and Bea explains. Henry has tea and biscuits brought up, and they go through the acronym, then talk about pronouns and terms like 'nonbinary' and 'aromantic' that aren't part of the official list. Then Philip asks about what he should do if his kid is queer, and about whether or not he can say 'queer', and what he should say if he can't, and they talk about it over dinner. He takes notes on his phone, his questions coming more and more easily as he realizes that Bea and Henry won't be upset with him if he asks something the wrong way. Catherine finds them finishing dinner and joins them, asking questions of her own about what things mean and how she can better look after them and queer folks in the UK more broadly. Philip answers one of her questions, looking to Bea and Henry for confirmation but answering it well, and Henry feels a little rush of pride as the night closes in around them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter where I almost accidentally named Philip's child after Pez because "Percival Arthur" sounded nice and I forgot "Pez" is a nickname lmao.  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


	7. Where There is Sadness, Let Me Bring Joy

They're all back together again for the first time in ages, Nora and Pez joining the sets of siblings at Kensington. Nora's going to be running a final game in their series of D&D stream fundraisers, and she's promised a truly chaotic game that Henry can't wait for. But, about thirty minutes before it starts, he runs into Philip in a foyer. Philip looks upset.

"Pip? Everything alright?"

"I just had a talk with Gran. She... she doesn't think it'll work. The charity I was considering, I mean; she says it'll be too much to do, and I'm scared she's right. She has more of a sense of how things work on a structural level than I do; I only really know what it's like on the ground. And on the ground, you see all these people who miss their families, or who are going through hard things, but maybe... maybe there isn't anything we can do about it. Maybe she's right."

"Pip. With all due respect, which is very little, Gran doesn't know what she's talking about. She's old as shit." Philip lets out a bark of laughter at that, sounding more surprised than anything. "You know what she said when she found out we'd be playing D&D and sending out dice and having fun to raise money for the youth shelters? She called me, personally, to tell me it was undignified and bound to be a failure. She said that kids couldn't handle the responsibility of ordering royalty around, and that I was besmirching the honor of the crown by playing a satanic game with children for all the world to see."

"Didn't... those went well, didn't they?"

"They've been one of our most successful charity campaigns. So popular, we're playing another tonight, raising money for the shelters and for Bea's work. Whichever of us gets more donations has to eat a spoonful of the infamous Diaz family double spicy salsa live on camera. If we get enough, we both have to do it."

"The game sounds like a great idea, and I'm sure people will want to see you both deal with something that spicy. You'll have a great time."

Henry takes a minute, then says, "if you want, I bet you could join us. You could announce your charity and make it an early fundraiser if you want to risk the salsa, or you could just play with us for fun."

"I... you're sure you'd all want me to play?"

"I think so. I could ask everyone, but I don't really see a reason why not."

"If you think it would be okay, I'd like that. And maybe... I don't want to take anything away from you or Bea, but if you think it would be okay, maybe I could sort of... generally explain the plan for my charity and see about raising some support? I don't want the official opening or announcement to be on a D&D game, especially since it's so last minute, but maybe do a sort of soft opening."

"I think that makes sense. Let me text Nora and the others to make sure they're okay with you playing, then I'll teach you the basics and we'll get you a bear."

Half an hour later, they're sitting down in front of a camera, Philip armed with a rudimentary knowledge of how the game works and an unhinged polar bear whose role in their heist will be to be the face of the operation. Nora makes them roll for hats to wear, and Philip rolls a cowboy hat, so he becomes a cute unhinged polar bear in a cowboy hat. He explains his charity wearing said cowboy hat, and Bea explains hers in a trilby and Henry explains his in both a fez and a top hat, so they are obviously ready to be taken entirely seriously by the British public. It is especially obvious how serious this whole thing is when Alex, wearing a top hat of his own, protests that the salsa isn't even that bad, and Nora threatens that it might burn the taste buds off royals used to plain toast. When the announcements of charities and prizes are over and the Diaz Double Spicy Salsa has been placed ominously behind them, Nora gets down to business, explaining their mission to steal not only the world's best honey, but also the beehive of legendary American president Abraham Lincoln, thought to be haunted by the ghost of Lincoln himself, from a convention being held in the middle of a bustling city. 

Alex, a polar bear officially labeled "incompetent", is the brains behind the operation, so it's off to a great start, especially when they find out that Bea _also_ rolled to be the brains of the operation, and her rookie honey badger isn't much better at it. June is the muscle of their group, a slick sun bear ready to sense honey and not let anything stand in her way, and she takes initiative to pull doors off buildings and break down walls while getaway driver Pez (an equally incompetent polar bear) drives through them and Philip is left trying to explain away the rubble they leave behind them. Henry, a retired sun bear tasked with hacking into systems, has just gotten a safe open to reveal not the honey they're after, but a note from a rival team of bears who got there first. As he's reading it, the doors slam closed, and the room begins to fill with poison gas. At the last minute, June moves as many stats as she safely can to bear, and rolls to tear down the door. It flies off its hinges, and Pez bursts through as Henry hacks into the other bears' GPS while Philip, on Alex's orders, impersonates a human for the news and asks for any calls about bear criminals to be directed to him. It's a whirlwind of chaos and laughter that culminates in a nearly impossible getaway, with Pez almost giving up all his bear instincts and June nearly being picked up by animal control as they make a final escape back to the woods. 

Nora closes them down in a final scene so moving it deserves an Oscar, and the players cheer, Philip joining them in their laughter. Nora pulls up their donation results and grins.

"What are the numbers, Nora?" Henry asks.

"Good news for all of you, we blew our goal out of the water. Which means, it's three big spoons of double spicy, coming right up." She passes the spoons out, and Alex grabs the salsa. He grins as he passes it down, and Pez dips an experimental chip into it before passing it on to Henry. He tries it, then laughs.

"Ooh, this is going to hurt."

Henry looks at his siblings, each of them with a spoonful of salsa, Philip looking like he might have a regret or two. Alex counts them down, and they all put it in their mouths at the same time. 

Philip's whole face goes red almost immediately. Henry feels himself start sweating, and he reaches for the milk greedily as Alex pours it. He glances past Philip to Bea, expecting to see her struggling like he and Philip are, but she looks absolutely normal. He manages a " _how?_ " in between gulps of milk, and she shrugs.

"It's good. Hot, but good. I like it. Pez, pass the chips." 

Pez is laughing as they cut the cameras. Henry emerges from his glass of milk to see Alex leaning forward to kiss him, and rather than the nice kiss he was expecting, he's met with a heat that could rival dragon breath, leaving him reaching for more milk as Nora laughs. Philip is laughing, too.

Later, they'll find out just how much they raised for Philip's charity even before it's officially off the ground. Philip will open his instagram or twitter and find out just how willing supporters of Bea and Henry are to rally behind him, and even more importantly, he'll realize just how many members of the military, current and former and from all levels, support his ideas and his work. He'll find DMs full of stories and love, and fan art of them as bears, wearing ridiculous hats and stealing honey from a high rise. But for now, he makes eye contact with a sputtering Henry, and they smile, and something unspoken passes between them.

It feels like one of the promises they would have made each other when they were little, barely able to understand what a promise was. Like they're promising to fight dragons and cross oceans and go to space for each other, and to be best friends forever and ever and never fight or say bad things ever. And maybe they'll never be best friends again, and there will probably be times where they'll say bad things or lash out, but in that moment, Philip knows: he'd fight a dragon for Henry. He'd fight a dragon, and parliament, and their Gran, and anyone else Henry needed him to fight. And he knows that Henry would do the same for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The game they're playing is called Honey Heist, and I rolled for all their roles/hats, so it really is as chaotic as it seems. It's great, played almost entirely with d6s, and a super easy intro to D&D!  
> \--  
> As always, I'm [HMS-Chill](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/hms-chill) on tumblr for fic stuff, and I'd love to chat either there or here. Thanks y'all!


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